Adopting the inverse habit

To often, when we try to quit something, whether it be eating sweets, watching tv, or going to bed at 3, we focus on what it is we’re trying to not do.

Hence our reliance on sheer willpower to make it through.

Of course, as any first-rate behavioral therapist will tell you, that’s only half the story.

You don’t terminate a habit, you replace it.

In large part, it’s not about what you’re giving up, it’s what you’re supplanting your old habit with.

It’s not about quitting sweets as it is eating greens, healthy fats, and protein until you’re content.

It’s not about not watching tv as it is doing something else instead.

It’s not about not staying up late as it is plopping yourself on your bed at midnight, and reading (or counting sheep) until you fall asleep.

Likewise, the inverse of snobbery is humility. And the opposite of apathy is curiosity.

To change a habit, to discard a behavior, is to invent a new pattern of action, to adopt a novel practice or posture.

Cease the self-restraint. Focus on the inverse instead.